Chor ke Ghar Chori :)

This is a confession post for the what I and the Chai Dude are repeatedly doing these days. Since I do enjoy the output so I agree being the partner in this crime. On the contrary we are not at all guilty for doing this and truly enjoy and repeat this act again and again. So let me stop playing with words and get straight with our crime details.

I have this friend - Chai Dude (sorry buddy but this was the first and the best name that came to my mind for a die hard tea fan like you). Now our Chai Dude guy is just too crazy about tea and I am pretty sure even in these recession times if needed he can open up an “Assorted Chai Shop” which will be a sure shot hit with me being an obedient customer everyday. Ok so we were talking about Chai Dude’s talent – he makes varieties of tea, would try adding different flavors each time or will change the sequence in which he adds the ingredients and on top of that would explain what went well and what not each time. Moreover even in office our communicator conversations are mostly around tea!!

Me: hey i m thinking to take off tomorrow, feeling too tired and sleep deprived
Chai Dude: ya and I’ll make you warm tea. Two days u did not drink tea u became sick. So don’t crib abt hot summer just drink tea its good for head ache, skin & complexion. It curbs mental anxiety. If devdas drank tea instead of alcohol he would got himself hooked with Paro instead of dying
Me: I agree
Chai Dude: Tea is Gods own creation, appreciate it!
Me: ok boss
Chai Dude: u know the only time osama doesn’t think of bombing innocent people is when he is drinking tea and smoking his hukka. So lets drink tea to world peace

And the tea benefits saga goes on and on……….

Since he can not make the Indian style tea in office so he came up with a workaround - Why not try ice tea? And he came out with an excellent drink but again his creativity comes in scene and he wants a lemon ice tea now. He could not find any lemonade in the vending machine on his floor, so curiously opened up the fridge and grabbed someone's lemonadebottle.. He couldn’t resist his hyperactive tea taste buds so stole some from it. I was invited to sip the output and trust me the theft was worth it :). This was repeated twice and then he pinged me the third day saying:

Chai Dude: Hey, I think we have to get lemonade, i can’t resist the temptation of ice tea. u know with lemon the best part is even if u make the tea extra strong it will be better. But we’ll have only plain tea today, i am scared to steal more lemonade. it is already half :(
Me: Then buy it from the vending machine
Chai Dude: sold out
Me: go to some other floor n buy
Chai Dude: ok let me do that and see, will call u
(In just another minute he pings back :))
Chai Dude: Hey forget it i am going to steal it. i am making ice tea,c u on my floor.

He has even written a recipe for this Lemon Ice tea, here it goes:
Ingredients:
½ glass of warm water dispensed from office coffee vending machine, 2 tea bags, 2 tsps sugar,
½ glass of stolen lemonade and lots of ice
Recipe:
Mix all the ingredients, have a nice drink and make fun of your lousy room mate and also the guy whom you stole the lemonade from.
Tip: Tastes good only if the lemonade is stolen :)

To our surprise the next day lemonade bottle was gone!! A day after that a new bottle was replaced in the refrigerator. The bottle remained sealed for a day so our Chai Dude became all cautious and started wondering – did the owner got to know about his stealing? what if he wants to find him? So what should he do now?? Neither could he resist the temptation to have lemon Ice tea nor he wanted to be caught. So he comes up with a plan to wait for some time and then steal. And during this time he sends status emails to me like the one below with subject – “Update from Chief Commander”

Crouching Tiger calling Hidden Dragon, Crouching Tiger calling hidden dragon..krrrrrrrrr (sound of wireless radio static)
There have been recent activities observed in “Project LIT (Lemon Ice Tea)” krrrrrr
Krrrrrr , the lemonade bottle has been used. Looks like the primary suspect has temporary de-activated the radars to get a glass full Krrrrrrr. We are going to execute Plan A after 48 hours. krrrrrrr..
Long live the tea……..
Buwahhaahahahahhaha (Evil laughter followed by sound of thunder and lightening)

PS: Plan A is nothing but stealing half a glass of lemonade.

We did bring lemonade and lemon syrup at home long back so that he takes that to office but he forgets everyday and then ends up stealing :). Finally today he got the lemon syrup to office but things went the other way……..

Chai Dude: Fate played a cruel trick on me. I wanted to change my criminal ways and got my own lemon syrup but when I went there I noticed my lemon syrup was gone
Me: oops !!
Chai Dude: seriously its true, its gone n i dont know if it is stolen or thrown away why would anyone take the whole bottle away? they can use and keep it back just like me :(

By the way at the end of the day he did find his Lemon Syrup back. As per him – “someone stuffed it deep inside the fridge, there is god!! So let me go and have his lemon ice tea now:)

Coffee Session Series - I

One thing which I have enjoyed the most in US is the “Starbucks”. I just like everything about it – the ambience, the aroma of coffee/cinnamon in the air, the crowd and yes not to forget my favorites – hot chocolate, chai latte and the marble loaf. To go there I don’t even wait for a company, just go whenever I want. And Friday mornings are a routine for me -sometimes while talking to Dad on phone, at other times just walking with my thinking cap on or just wandering blankly or simply enjoying looking at everyone around me. I have three of these near my office. One is just right down near the Hilton reception another next to it in the Marriot and the third one is across the street. My favorite is the farthest one i.e. across the street and I prefer going there via Marriot - the crowd and ambience of this place is just too lively to freshen you up.

Today is not a Friday but I still had an urge to just get up and go. So asked a friend to come along. Though I don’t know him much, but enjoy his narrations of small things and he is perhaps one of the very few people with whom I talk less and listen more :). He wears pooja kumkum on his head to office everyday which reminds me of Indian temples. Bingo! I initiate today’s first topic that he is growing fat day by day :) The comment was accepted, justified, forgotten off in a few seconds and pushed back seat. Now he starts of the time when he came to US - almost three years ago and how he could never manage to go back due to one reason or the other. I had always felt people get a good salary and enjoy a good life here that’s why they stay but my views are taking a 'U' turn now. I have started understanding this never ending loop of things going on and on one after the other. So he continues with what all he has missed in the past three years – lots of cousin marriages so next time he goes back he will be a stranger in his own family trying to recognize their spouses and in some cases their kids too. He remembered his school going younger sibling when he had first left house for job. Now she is a young girl about to finish off her college and all set to be married. The house where he had spent more than 20 yrs has been broken down and altogether a new construction is done at its place with all the funds sent by him. So when he goes back people will introduce him to his own home else he will be lost… He talked about his long sleeping tales, festival cerimonies at home , about the mother & granny who are tired of counting days of his return , dad who wants him to resign and come back home, sister who wants to spend time with her brother before she is married off… But he still has to fulfill his current job commitments and lots of other priorities. I wondered we all know who is more important for us but are still helpless with the practicalities of life.

I divert him from his senti mode onto a funnier note and he switched over to a funny incident that had happened a few days back. While going back from office he was waiting for the elevator, quite tired and frustrated with lots of things going on in his mind. Wait first I need to explain you all the exact location where he was standing so that you can visualize the scene and enjoy :). In our office there are elevators that bring you down from all floors to the lobby. On the other side is the cafeteria with two elevators on its side that take us down to the parking zone. This cafeteria closes down in the afternoon and has a car garage like door. Back to the scene - a girl comes, who is I guess also in her own world and shouts – “Oh my god! How will I go back home? The garage is closed and my car?? Oh no” So here comes our hero.(my friend who has jacket on one hand and his laptop bag on the other) He looks towards the girl and stretches his both hands pointing towards the two elevators each on one side. The girl takes it as an invite for a hug and comes and hugs him!! And our hero is surprised till date as to how did this happen. He considers that God sent him an angel to comfort him :) . With non stop giggling I came back to my desk.

Jalebiiii

Yes I made these. And they tasted as good as they look, at least as per me who was having them after more than a year. Though I have a sweet tooth for all “mithai” but Jalebi is my all time favorite. My sweet memories of Jalebi’s date back to my mom’s home where we all used to go in the summer vacations. My granny would get up early and walk down to the market to get these freshly made in front of her eyes. The shopkeeper would pack these in a wooden basket and by the time we kids got up its smell was all around the kitchen. All of us would sit around her, each with a bowl full of hot saffron milk and then she would dip Jalebi’s in our bowls. She is gone now and that special treatment too but that taste is still missed by all of us.

For a long time my favorite advertisement on TV used to be - the Jalebi ad of “Dhara Oil” – any bells ringing!! I used to love the expression on that kids face when he would say Jalebiiiiiii….. if you still don’t remember watch it again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mk8Z0WbSWV0&feature=related Courtesy - you tube.

Back at my home, I share this sweet tooth characteristic with my Dad so always had a good company to have the yummy Jalebi’s. Rest all in the family would just taste them and not relish as we both did. My frequency of eating Jalebi’s increased when I went to hostel. Not that these were tastier or better made there but I missed them more in the hostel. So each time I was back, Dad would bring these without me even asking for it. At times I would accompany him to the shop as I enjoy watching the way they are made. Its the first sweet made in the shops and crazy people like me do get up early even on weekends to savor them hot & crispy. In my hometown it is considered as a rich breakfast, served to guests and in family get togethers, especially in the chilling winters. So each time an out of town guest or a distant relative came it would be a treat for me too... :)

My Jalebi attraction continued when I started working in Pune. There was a shop near my flat, where nice Jalebi’s were made. My friends would take the nearby natural’s ice-cream and I would grab the Jalebi’s always.

When I first came to US, a friend asked my favorite sweet – pop came the answer “Jalebi” but this joy was gone the moment I tasted it. They were the worst I had ever had! and I never dared to try them again fearing I might forget the original mouth watering taste. But missed them each time I saw these in the shops. All my Jalebi memories were refreshed a few days back after watching Delhi-6. Now I wanted to have these more but still won’t be able to eat the crap stuff available in the Indian Sweet Stores here. So finally, I decided to try it myself. Got up lazily on a saturday to make breakfast(bread+omlette) but then the Jalebi idea came again, with all the zeal to make an effort this time and here I began. The biggest issue was I don’t have a Jalebi maker to get that spiral shape. First option came to my mind was to use a cloth with a hole, I have seen shopkeepers doing that in India - but this didn’t work well for me. Next option – Make a cone of plastic sheet, difficult but I remembered the output and gave it a try :). And it worked fine or should say I made it work fine. The result is what you see in the snap above. So this weekend I did have a rich breakfast mmmmm…….

"Lost"

It’s been almost four yrs that I am working in this so called “Corporate World” but have never felt so helpless. I remember someone had told me in my initial few months that in professional life there are no friends; I was never convinced by this statement. Later on I concluded that I was correct because it was here that I got the best of friends, had loads of fun and above all learnt a lot. All those people are no longer around me, they are scattered all over but just not near me. So now I am in an alien world, where I just know the correct names of the people around me and I guess that’s all!!

From past few days I am getting more and more lost and misplaced in this crowd. Can’t judge who’s genuine and who’s fake. Don’t know what to speak and what not to in front of each of them. Seems like everyone around is wearing a beautiful mask so then how am I supposed to judge whose the smiling devil here!!. I believe they all might have been straight some day and some or the other experience made them this way, but I am still in no mood to compromise. So having a literally rocking time these days :)

For more than two decades I was taught – to be polite and a good listener to your elders; actions speak louder than words so do your work; always put in your 100% and never step on anyone else to move ahead. And now on the contrary I am being taught - the baby who cries the most gets the most, so yell; project your work even if it’s meaningless; never trust anyone and stab one another whenever you get a chance.

I guess I learnt the former lesson too hard so overwriting is difficult and as a result I am confused, irritated and definitely lost! And all this is visible in my behavior because I still haven’t learnt the art of pretending :(.

Perception.....

Right from the moment I had seen a glimpse of this movie, I wanted to see it. Finally yesterday we planned for today as it won’t be in the theatres from this Friday. I read no reviews even after two weeks of its release and avoided the expert opinion of almost everyone around me, they had hated the movie and tagged it as "Crap". Seriously some of them are so much into there negativity shell that now I am deaf when they open their mouth. In their words "all movies can be either of these types - irritating, frustrating, ok or time pass. Somehow I can never be satisfied with this categorization and perhaps don’t even want to :)

So I start my day to finish off the work by 4:30pm to head for the 5:15 show. Outlook opens and here comes a meeting invite to lead a requirement elicitation session scheduled from 4-5pm today!! Still hopeful I plan the runaway to the theatre straight from the meeting room. Packed my stuff... gave to a friend in advance...asked them to start from their desks when I give them a missed call and pick me up from right outside the office building ( in order to save 10 mins of the parking lot walk). With everything set I enter the conference room to find no one there!! Oops everyone is late, why today??? We finally start and continue till 5:15pm :(. Last 20 mins for me were like oh god please stop stop stop !!! But we went on and on........ So change of plan again, we will go for a later show today itself.

Finally in the theatre but directed to a wrong room..... sat and a few mins later realized that we are not watching any trailer, its altogether a different movie :) . I peeped into each screen to find the correct one at last. With zero expectations and just the three of us in the theatre we started watching the movie.

Disclaimer: Before I explain my perspective I would state this is totally as per my perception and not any expert verdict, so everyone is free to disagree.
By intermission my colleagues were all fed up and they started complaining , of these the best one was "Is this a movie or a daily sequence of events, what is this story all about??” Being asked again and again I opened my mouth - "I am not judging the whole movie but just enjoying the bits & pieces of these everyday activities". Yes a realistic movie which I could relate to in a lot of things - the red chili pickle which mom makes (in US you don’t even get to see these fresh red chilies), the neighbors getting overjoyed when a kid returns hometown, the namaz when everyone bows in gratitude to Allah, the saffron milk served in Jagran. In my granny's place, there are a few temples and a mosque near our house. We all used to sleep on terrace, hearing prayer jingles all night, counting stars and enjoying pillow fights till a final scream from Dad. Early morning the mosque prayer used to wake us. I miss the ash smell of wood coming from the mud stove and my granny sitting besides it. We all kids, along with my Dad used to sit in a semicircle around her and have breakfast. She always had a content smile while serving us. The background music used to be peacocks, pigeons and koel hummings.

Oops I am getting off track so right back to the movie – I liked the prayer that was sung, the good old Indian bargaining style (my mom does it this way with the shopkeeper– neither yours nor mine, lets settle in between :) ), the hot & crisp jalebis, the beautiful Taj (I’ll go here again on my next trip to India), the crazy kite flying sessions when the whole neighborhood gets together on terrace, the yummy pani puris and the cycle rickshaw ride - till date I enjoy this a lot in the walled city market of my hometown. Moreover the liveliness, crowds, congested streets and some or the other activity going on in each and every corner made me nostalgic.

Each time the Ram Leela session came on screen I could sense the crap feeling of my colleagues around but here also I liked the special effects and the way director had linked the screenplay dialogues to real life. Last but not the least was the 'black monkey saga'. This was actually a moral science lesson which we all had crammed theoretically but don’t realize when we are doing the same - Save oneself first, demean the weak, the person not available/invisible is always the culprit, follow the rat race blindly etc etc…

When the hero dies, I was cursing you Shanks and literally intended to come over at your place & hit you because this was what you had told me. Somehow I need a happy ending in the movie :) and yes the heroine looked good.

Here and there were some good dialogues too and my favorite is:

Zarre Zarre Mein Usi Ka Noor Hai
Jhak Khud Mein Woh Na Tujhse Door Hai
Ishq Hai Usse To Sab Se Ishq Kar
Is Ibadat Ka Yehi Dastoor Hai
Is Mein Us Mein Aur Us Mein Hai Wohi
Yaar Mera Har Taraf Bharpur Hai…..

And the best song was Rehna tu. I heard this song many times before and visualized it to be a romantic song but it was a patriotic sentimental number pictured in a beautiful way –a hustling bustling city, sleeping quietly in the night to take a break,rest and gather energy to stand back again the next day.

By now everyone might have thought that I can go on and on like this with more praises so I’ll pen down for now and categorize it as a "Feel Good Movie” in my list :) and hats off to the director for beautifully presenting these bits & pieces . Just to add – Thank you Dad for giving me this perception to find the best in everything, appreciate the good stuff and ignore the crap !!

Whats your name ??

Ahaa, another activity that I enjoy!!. I have always been fascinated by the great names especially the nicknames that we get to hear everyday of all the people around us. Sometimes they are weird and funny but at times sweet. It all starts with our parents and we don't have any choice with that, they will call us with any just like that name which might not have any meaning at all and then are our peers who will tease on those funny names. If you are fortunate enough to have a nice name then you will be definitely renamed with a screwed up version during your schooling/college/office. But each one of us will definitely have one; I myself have about a dozen in my kitty.

When I was a kid I believed if you are born as a twin then you need to have almost the same name with just a single letter different or the second child should have a rhyming name with the elder sibling. I can cite a whole lot of examples on this - Dimple:Simple, Himani: Himanshu, Ankit:Ankita, Neha:Nehal, Akhil:Nikhil, Ajay:Vijay, Deepak:Deepika, Manish:Manisha etc etc.. Sometimes during intro sessions in family get-togethers I used to promptly interfere in between and guess the second child's name. At times I was correct and at other times would get a you crook look !! Even when my brother was born he was first called with my rhyming nickname and I was furious, had to shout on top of my voice to that aunt of my Dad to dare not say that again, thankfully she didn't. But spoilt his name many times from Ladoo to Kicky and I am still doing it ;)

But my favorite till date remains "Kut Kut", yes each time I used to tell about it to someone they would say why kut kut and not biscuit :). I still don't know how he got his name and neither has this sweetheart kut kut been able to solve the mystery, though he told me not to call him by this name anymore on public forum ;) (He is a 6ft+ guy now). Another one is my sister's nickname - tutul. I know the story behind this name. When she was born my Dad was reading a novel which had this character called 'tutul'. Now each time someone asked we used to repeat the name twice or thrice and then spell it even after that people couldn't say it. I learned a trick some years later to teach her name’s pronunciation to people --> 2 + (toolbox -box) = 2tool :) I love this name too and that is why never added didi to it...

Another advantage of nicknaming is when you have to do back biting :). I and my friends keep some secret names then gossip, making them completely unaware that these people themselves are being talked about and it has been a lot of fun. By the way we use to change these secret names frequently with new ones to remove any traces of doubt. Shanks hope you got it !!

The motivation to write this post came from a colleague of mine whom I casually asked the other day - "I was thinking of giving you a nick name and she promptly said you can call me aaloo !!" I bursted laughing. She is so used to getting that name from people that now she has started suggesting it herself!! I was giggling for a long time after this.

The Invisible Girl !!

Yesterday was just another bad day for me, actually nothing bad happened but its one of those days when I miss home a lot, think about all the crap going around and crib :). During this cribbing session a friend of mine was trying to lift my spirits and suggested lets make the people who bother you invisible. And since I have to always think the opposite so pop came the reply "why them and not me, I should be invisible and have all fun". My friend imagined me banging every one's head starting alphabetically (I literally imagined this wow what a power :)). All types of crazy ideas started coming to my mind and the evil wheels in me started churning quickly. I entered my favorite zone - dreaming. Wow what a bliss, I can make all these people go mad jumping down here and there and enjoy the free show ;) It reminds me of a poem we read in nursery -"The Topsy Turvy Land", i enjoyed that a lot but had to cram it for an elocution contest.

OK so here I go on with my crazy imagination. Pour a big jar of hot coffee on the most blank person I have ever met till date, I don't know how can somebody be so dumb all the time and I cant tolerate him a second. Next would be the handsome hunk(though only he thinks so :) ) - give him an electric shock so that he can atleast stand straight (seriously each time I see him I remember a movie dialogue - were you born in a train !!). Next would be the non stoppable chatter box, this guy goes on and on and speaks just for the sake of speaking, for god sake we all know you can speak but its enuf. I will put quick fix on his mouth and enjoy the muteness :). We have this person in office who should be given the shabbiest hair award, every morning the hairdo is a scene to watch. After a recent haircut it has become more awful. I too wish to give this person another weird hair cut though I have never done this before :). Now comes the turn of our updates expert, who just enjoys giving updates(by emails) on each and every thing, I guess his outlook's out going service should be blocked. I can imagine his hell broke down frustrated face. Next would be the beer bottle / sleepy guy, i would take his sleeping snap and send that to his manager who will come and jump on his head. There is another person who always tries to be in every one's good books. Man the way he behaves in front of client is too funny, at times it has been very difficult for me to control my giggles. I would play his regional language songs on top volume in his room, and let the whole floor have fun. I am sure the decepticons (another bunch of ....) will start dancing.

Another hot point in my office is the coffee area, the K4 gang is always seen there. The coffee machine should not work only for them and then their great fundas will start.

Hmmm, I wish all this would have been a reality but its not :( and my dream is over, the reminder on laptop is blinking got to go for a client meeting.